British-isms That Breed Confusion and Hilarity

Since I’ve moved here, I’ve come across more than my fair share of words and phrases that cause a great number of misunderstandings between myself, my British friends and even strangers on the streets. These are a few of my personal faves:

‘Pants’ means undies over here. What we call ‘pants’, they call ‘trousers’.

“It’s too cold for her not to be wearing pants today”.
“How can you tell?”
“Just look at her. She’s not wearing any pants”.
“!?”

Culture Shock: Being Black in England

I’ve never defined myself by my skin colour. I came from a place where I never had to. Toronto is one of the most multi-cultural cities in the world, and race never seemed to be a big issue. Everyone managed to blend into the mosaic without compromising their own identities, and I feel like I may have taken this for granted. When I moved to England, I expected things to be similar, since I was under the impression that it was an equally-multicultural country – but that has not been my experience.
I live in a small town called Long Eaton, about a half hour away from the Nottingham city centre. On occasion, I see one or two people of colour, but I’m basically the only Black person around. When I go out in public, I’ve never been made to feel so out of place. People passing me in the street stare me straight in the face, silently interrogating me, trying to figure me out. When I try to start a friendly conversation or ask for help in a store, I am dismissed immediately. A woman clutched her purse as I walked past the other day.

St. Patrick’s Day in the UK

I must be pretty naïve. I told myself I wanted to get in and out of town before 4pm because it’s St. Patrick’s Day, and I didn’t want to be pulled into the festivities. Who would go out drinking at midday anyways?

But, if there are two things I’ve learned about British people, they are:
[1] Brits love to drink.
[2] They love to dress up.

So, I should have known better. If there is holiday set aside to do both, you’d better believe they would take advantage of it. We celebrate the occasion in Toronto. A few pubs will sell green beer and encourage patrons to wear green. The few authentic Irish pubs in the city will have line-ups outside that span the entire block. But, I was not at all prepared to witness St. Patrick's Day on a British scale.